Tag: amwriting

TV Shows – Rewatching

Daily writing prompt
What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?
View all responses

I watch two shows yearly: Buffy the Vampire Slayer && Charmed.

I have been watching these two shows yearly for a while now, I don’t think I can even tell you how many years. I have even bought the whole series of Buffy on DVD, just in case they stop streaming it.

I saw the other day that they were in talks of remaking it. Not really “remaking it” but bringing back the cast and making another season. I’m not sure I like the idea. But the child part of me likes the idea. Sarah Michelle Gellar said she’s willing to come back and do it, and she’s the one that has been in talks with Hulu to bring it back.

Here’s my thing. I love that show – I watched it as a child when it was first put on screen, so in 1998ish – I was 11. I used to watch it weekly with my mom, which is probably half the reason I find the show comforting. But honestly, if we are being honest here, they should have cancelled the show around season four. When they blew up the high school && Angel and Cordelia left.

Or, okay, let ‘s say four wasn’t the end – they probably should have stopped when Buffy jumped off the tower and into the swirly bits to protect Dawn. Honestly, they should have never brought her back to life. Because let’s be honest – the fact that they even remotely thought that she was in Hell was a complete sham. Buffy Summers saved the world, a lot. She wasn’t evil. She might have done some things that might have seemed evil, but Buffy was far from it.

&&& I hate what they did with the character of Dawn. She was made from Buffy. I think she should have been stronger. I think they should have made her a slayer. && if not, they could have made her a Guardian. They only spoke of them once, && I’m not sure they were called Guardians. But I think they could have done so much with that character. && sadly, now, we’ll never have a chance. Because I swear to everything green && holy, if they bring back that show, and they recast Dawn with another actress – I’ll riot. Michelle Trachtenberg is the only Dawn I’ll ever want to see in that series. Remember. I. Will. Riot.

People are still mad about David Boreanaz not wanting to reprise the role of Angel. He moved on. Let him stay moved on. Don’t get me wrong, if he wants to come back and be Angel again, let him, but don’t be mad at him if he doesn’t want to. You still have James Masters, he’ll reprise Spike.

Then of course there is the ones who said, “I don’t watch this show if they let Nicholas Brendon come back”. I will end that thought there, I have no thoughts about it.

The only thought I have about bringing back Buffy is…. you saw what they did to Charmed, right? Yes, I know it was a whole different cast && they didn’t allow the old cast to even be a part of it. But it wasn’t good. It looked like, from what I could tell, I only watched season one, that they followed the plot line of the original. Start with three sisters. One dies. Then finds out they have another sister.

I stopped watching it because I’m not one of those females that walk around screaming “GO WOMEN”, “WOMEN ARE GOOD MEN ARE BAD”. That’s what they did to that remake. They made it all about women && they didn’t have to.

Here’s a concept to think about. The original Charmed TV show was about women. Women doing great things and having power that men didn’t. Taking men down and women too. It was very much “woman powered”, but it didn’t throw it down your throat – the remake of Charmed, did. (That’s also why I stopped watching The Connors – well, besides it not having Roseanne in it, and they said that she died of an opioid overdose. Don’t get me started on how messed up that is. But when the Connors continued without Roseanne, and Darlene basically became the main star, they turned that into “women good – men bad”. && I hated what they did to the character of David.)

Basically, I’m not a feminist. I’m telling you right now, there are things men do I refuse to do. I don’t want to do it. && I’m also not one of the ones who think men are allowed to do things women aren’t. Tell me one thing ((&& do not tell me ‘not get raped’)) that men can do a woman can’t. Change my mind.

P.S. For anyone out there that has strong convictions that Buffy needs to be remade with a black slayer. Did everyone just forget about Kendra? The slayer who replaced Buffy when she died in Season One. The slayer who was a better character than Faith ever thought about being. The slayer they let be killed off by Drusilla so Faith could bloom. Forget about her?

P.P.S. I really hated the character of Kennedy.

P.P.P.S. I don’t think they should have killed Amber.

P.P.P.P.S. Sineya, the first slayer, was black. Try to tell me otherwise. Nikki Wood, Principal Wood’s mother. Remember? Spike killed her in the train in New York. Black. I could probably keep going on this for a while. Stop saying that Buffy was a bad show just because the main slayer on it was a white, blond girl. The second most powerful slayer on that show, Kendra, wasn’t white. I was always sad that they killed her – I think they should have let her stay. Faith was fine – but I liked Kendra better.

“I am Kendra. The Vumpire Slaya.”

Revelations.

What have you recently had a revelation about?

I tell you hwat! I’m not liking the last couple days of questions. Hopefully they begin to get better. So another rambling post.

I finished the book I was reading today. && I thoroughly enjoyed it. Had a few cracks about white people in it, but honestly, the cracks weren’t too far off. I think I’m really starting to enjoy thrillers / mysteries. I don’t know what it was about “Almost Surely Dead” by Amina Akhtar, but duuuuuuuuuuude! If you’re in a reading slump I advise you to purchase this book. It’ll pull you straight out of it.

I started another, “The New House” by Tessa Stimson. A friend of mine is in a book club, which I’ve secretly always wanted to be in one, && she added me to their Facebook page – which I accepted. This month they picked this book to read so I’m quietly reading it myself. Why not? It was $0.99 for the Kindle book. I’m not very far into it, when I started reading it I was at work && it was shift change, so it got loud. Figured I’ll read some on it tomorrow – or possibly tonight if I don’t pass out quickly.

Today is Friday, I still haven’t heard back from the weight loss people. I remember when I first sent them a message about getting in with them it took them two weeks – so do I give them two weeks or call back Monday – wait, Monday is a Holiday – Tuesday? We got take out tonight for dinner because we were going to be out late. Boyfriend wanted pizza, so as we were walking into Dominoes to grab his stuff we had to walk by Catos. I sighed at the sight of it and just thought about how I am ready to be able to purchase clothes inside of a store. The last time I was able to do that I was nineteen. Since then it’s been online clothes with hopes that it actually fits. 

I’m trying to think if I have anything else to ramble about before I log off && go to bed.

I think I’ve talked myself into beginning a new story. I don’t know if I will finish it or get irritated and toss the notebook out a window. But I’m going to attempt to begin something. I have had a few ideas that I really liked, I just have to get my brain straight so I can write. I’ll keep you posted on how that goes.

Chapter Three.

What did you learn from last year?

People ask questions like this for insight, to make things sound better than they did the year before. I”m not sure I’m that inquisitive. 

2023 sucked. I think it sucked for everyone one way or another. 
Mine sucked because I had a lot of heart ache. It was the year anniversary of my best friends death. She died in July of 2022, but I felt the year aftermath. I buried my cat, which to a lot doesn’t mean much. But the end of March will always be a sad time for me because that cat was… I’ve always made fun of people (to myself not to them) when they tell me that their cat or dog is like a child to them. Until Dotty was born. Dotty was… Right now I’m looking down the barrel of that year aftermath && I know when March gets here it’s going to hurt just as much as it did in 2023 when I found her.

But at the same time, 2023 was great!
I got a raise at work. If I didn’t have debts before the raise because I couldn’t afford to live beforehand, the raise would be great. 
I got engaged to Boyfriend. Planning on doing that in 2025.

But did I learn anything? 

I would love to say that I learned a bunch. That I went on some soul searching journey && found the meaning of life. Or that I realized what was missing in my life. Or something huge && big.

All I realized is that I only read seven books this year, and one of them that I thought I read was actually in 2022. I also realized that I haven’t written anything since I finished Frost && that’s been at least three years.

Maybe 2024 will be the year I actually learn something? Or realize something? Or feel something I haven’t felt before.

Making Excuses.

What do you want to be different about this year?

While wandering around Wal-Mart in their tiny book section I came across “A 6 Tear A Day Memory Journal”. It has lined pages and each day has a new question to answer. I have had it for a couple months && I’ve been waiting for January 1st so I could actually start answering them. So that’s what I’m doing. I started yesterday && every day I’m going to answer the question for that day.

What do I want to be different about this year? That could go many directions but to be honest, I’d really just like to stop making excuses && actually jump out the window into the pouring rain && never look back.

When it comes to losing weight, I have excuses.
When it comes to writing more, I have excuses.
When it comes to following my dreams, I have excuses.

I’m pretty sure I’d have an excuse for any && everything you might wanna send my way. But I’m tired of trying to think of excuses as to why I can’t do something. Starting now, I’m done with that. I’m either going to do it or not do it. There’s going to be no more I’d write more if I had something to write about. No more, I’d lose weight if I could find the time to exercise. No more I can’t follow my dreams because my dreams are dumb.

Sitting here today do I know that stopping the excuse making will help me achieve anything that I want? No.
Will it help? Probably not.
But at least this way, I can say I gave it my all && didn’t make an excuse as to why it didn’t happen.

Happy New Year!

What is your number one New Years Resolution?

My New Year resolution doesn’t really change much. But it ranges. One year it’ll be to write the next great American novel. The next year it will be to lose weight. The next will be back to writing & then to losing weight. It’s a back and forth battle I’m probably never going to win.

2020 was to lose weight.
2021 was to write more.
2022 was to lose weight.
2023 was to write more.
2024, back to losing weight.
2025 – will be to write more.
See how that works?

Maybe this year I just need to say both – lose weight && write more.

I have been watching sitcoms lately that have already finished. No longer airing. Right now I’m on Mike & Molly && a part of me is jealous of the decision that Molly made. For anyone who didn’t watch it, she was a teacher for ten years. During a state standardized test she flipped a switch – crawled out of her classroom window && into the rain – telling her students to never stop dreaming. That’s the day she walked away from her career to make writing her full time job. Has she been having ups and downs? Thinking she wasn’t good enough? Looking into other jobs – driving instructor, forklift driver. Well yes.. But a small part of me wishes I could just crawl out a window at work and into a rainstorm and never look back. But sadly, my job has no windows && I can’t just quit my job because I need the income that being a full time unpaid writer wouldn’t give me.

But at the same time, of course, I wonder to myself – would I be okay without working? I took two weeks vacation in November && by the end of it I was pretty grumpy. I’m not sure if it’s because of me not going to work or if it’s because most of it I was alone because Boyfriend was still going to work – he didn’t have the vacation time to take off like I did.

In conclusion to my rambling. 2024’s main goal is to lose weight. The minor goal is to write more. The smallest of goals (say that in your head with a squeak to your voice) is to become a paid writer of sorts. It can even just be a blog writer. I’ll be okay with that. && be able to crawl out of my works window, into the pouring rain, and never look back.

More Books.

List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?

  1. Gabriel’s Inferno” by Sylvain Reynard
    I have read books that I stop && think oh wow, that’s a good book. Then I have read books that I thought this isn’t very good. When I first came across “Gabriel’s Inferno”, I had just finished reading “50 Shades of Grey” (which I found out about because of Ellen D. && her talk show where she was talking about someone reading it on a plane, it’s not as funny written in words, but trust me, it was a great moment.) && I was looking for another book to read in that genre, or close to it. Keep in mind one thing, I had never read “smut”, “mommy porn”, “erotica” in my life. I was never interested, until I read “50 Shades of Grey”, which I guess a lot of woman can say that. When I first found “Gabriel’s Inferno” I got a clip of it on my Kindle to see if liked it before I actually bought it. I tried to read it and was unable. So I read a few of Sylvia Day’s books – in the same genre.

    After a while of it sitting on my kindle I gave it another try – which is where my obsession with Sylvian Reynard began. When I finally sat down and read the book I realized I had been missing out on so much. I tend to read books that I feel are in my “IQ Range” and I felt that his books, all of his books, are way above my IQ. (I’m not as smart as people think I am.) I think it’s half the reason I was so hesitant to read it. But lord, let me tell you, when I finally did read it and got into it. It’s like the heaven’s opened up and I was in love.

    I know a lot of people that have read this series && they all basically say the same thing: “it’s great”, “wonderfully written”, “I’m obsessed”, “I need to know who the author is”, “did he put himself into it”… it goes on & on. I read to escape, and when I first read this book I was single, and lonely. It’s like the book gave me a friend for a while. I have read that series multiple times and I will probably read it again & again.

    I know this much, I’m not sure if anyone has ever said this about a book, but I’m a closet writer. (What?! Who wouldn’t have known.) But when I get into a writing slump I will pull his books out && read them. Those books give me the oompth I need to write something. It’s something small, but it’s huge for me. I hope Sylvian Reynard knows that when he wrote that series he wrote a masterpiece for some.

    I know it said “book” && I did write the first one as my first book, but if you read the first you HAVE to read the whole series. Trust me on that.
  2. “On Writing” by Stephen King.
    I know this seems like a weird choice for most people. But for me it helped me in ways I wasn’t sure it would have. I bought this book because I googled books about writing a writer should read. I purchased this one and one other, that I can’t remember the name of so that says something.

    When I started reading this book I was trying to keep an open mind but what was I going to learn from Stephen King? At the time of buying it I was having issues with my writing. I have written one book from start to finish && I’m not sure I even like it anymore. When I thought of the idea I was all for it but as I began writing && having trouble && having people tell me I can’t write the way I write, I realized it wasn’t fun anymore. So I hadn’t written in a while at that point.

    But as I read through this book I realized that some of the things I did while writing he said it was okay. I know it’s silly to go off of one writers words, but he knows something about it, doesn’t he? I continued to read through the book and I put sticky notes through out it && I highlighted things I wanted to remember.

    I have always lived with the thought that your writing must be in your voice. That way you live && the way you talk. But I have had people that attempt to correct everything that is my voice, so I started to believe it and was attempting to write in a more “smart way”. Using a thesaurus to find bigger words for the small ones I use, and using one word instead of a whole sentence. But then – when I read this book I realized that I was right. I need to keep the words to what I say and how I say it. How will people believe I’m the one that wrote it if I don’t speak the same way?

    On page 174, hit me like a ton of bricks. I have trouble describing characters. I can see them in my head very well, but when I go to describe them in words, it’s as if words fail me. On this page of his book it helped me a lot:

    “I’m not particularly keen on writing which exhaustively describes the physical characteristics of the people in the story and what they’re wearing (I find wardrobe inventory particularly irritating; if I want to read descriptions of clothes, I can always get a J. Crew catalogue). I can’t remember how many cases where I felt I had to describe what the people in a story of mine looked like-I’d rather let the reader supply the faces, the builds and the clothing as well. If I tell you that Carrie White is a high school outcast with a bad complexion and a fashion-victim wardrobe, I think you can do the rest, can’t you?”

    Summing this up because I could talk forever – this book helped me realize that my writing isn’t as bad as some people like to tell me. && using smaller words, because that’s how I talk, isn’t a bad thing. That I can go without a full description of characters, leaving something to imagination, if I want to. It made me realize that I need to stop beating myself up everything I attempt to write something just because one person tells me I can’t do that. Plus, he didn’t like his first book either. So there’s that.
  3. We will leave this one blank for now…
    I know I have talked about a lot of different books. They all mean something to me in one way or another, but to have an impact on me I feel like I shouldn’t question it at all. I was thinking through the books I have read, and I can question all of them, minus the first two.

    So for now, I’ll leave the third blank. I’ll be able to fill the slot one day. So many more books to read.

Books & More Books.

Do you remember your favorite book from childhood?

I’m not sure I read as much as I wish I had growing up, especially as a child. I did read – free pizza’s, come on. We all read. But I’m not sure I read enough when I didn’t have to be reading.

But I remember in the 9th grade borrowing a couple books from a friend: “The Silver Kiss” && “Blood & Chocolate” both by Annette Curtis Klause. && I remember those two books being really prominent in my world. It’s actually what got me reading books about vampires and werewolves.

I remember trying to find a quiet place when I was reading “Blood & Chocolate” – I ended up in my brothers room. It was the farthest room from everything && he was rarely home. I remember laying in his bed, head buried deep into the story, until my dad came looking for me. He found me && when he said my name it scared the crap out of me! I jumped, threw the book, && yelped.

Since then, however, I have found books that I enjoy much more. They usually aren’t about vampires or werewolves, and are usually considered romance. But for Little Barb – “The Silver Kiss” && “Blood & Chocolate” was it.

Worlds.

Trying to break into worlds is hard.

No, this isn’t about me trying to find a way into another galaxy or proving that there is life in space. What I’m stating, is facts, that when you try to break into worlds it’s hard.

The writing community is huge. A lot of book worms, writers, authors, agents, editors, etc. && trying to get welcomed into it is like trying to sit at the popular table in high school. Sadly, I was never invited.

I have never been good at popularity contests && I wasn’t part of the “in crowd” && thinking that the writing community makes me feel like that is a harsh reality. I honestly know it’s not a popularity contest… but I feel like that. I also feel if you don’t have the money to spend you’ll never be published.

I figured the best way for an unknown is to publish it myself. Which is totally fine – I don’t mind doing the hard work. But I really wanted a professional editor to read through it, find the errors but unless I can poop out nearly $3,000 that will never happen. &&& I know they are worth the money, I just don’t have it to spend.

Then I think ‘okay, let’s skip the professional editing.’ Knowing that it’s self published, “most” readers will look over a lot of them. I will just edit the crap out of it.

Next hurdle. To self-publish, you need extra money. Thousands. I found a company that helps self publish but as I began reading I realized that not only do they request thousands of dollars they also keep 80¢ on every dollar for themselves so I would only get 20¢ of every dollar sold. Whereas, if I do it all myself and use Amazon, I get 70% of the royalties.

But then I think about going with my other passion but breaking into the food world is just as hard – if not harder. I guess when they say “you need money to make money” they weren’t kidding. But sadly, here I am with no money.

I did upload a couple chapters of the book. I figured if it gets enough notice that either that company will want to publish it or it shows that if I was to save the money, step-by-step it, that people would be interested in purchasing the book.

Frost the Novel.

Frost

I have decided to step out of my comfort zone. To do so I have uploaded the first few chapters (through chapter three), so I can get feedback on it. If you happen to read it, and you like it, please hit the heart button.

I also understand that not everyone likes every book written, so it won’t hurt all of my feelings if someone doesn’t like it. But at the same time, I hope people like it.

Through that website, if it’s like && enough buzz, they would consider publishing it.