Tag: life

Dream Home.

Write about your dream home.

First – the kitchen has to be HUGE! Like… lots of room. Lots of counter space. I want a walk-in pantry that has shelves throughout it, plus, on the walls, I want can holders built in. I want an island in the middle of the kitchen that has a sink built in the top, the side of the island to have a built-in fridge, small just for drinks – I want plugs to be on the opposite side of the island. I want a water faucet, those long thing ones, above the stove that shoots out hot water. I want electrical plugs and lights up underneath the cabinets. OOH… I want so many cabinets.

Living room needs to have a whole spot for the television, gaming systems, and sound system. Plus, I’d love a working fireplace – and a small stage off to the side in front of a set of windows with small railings around it. That’s for my Christmas tree. I don’t know what I’ll use it for after that, but I definitely want it for my tree.

Along the ceiling connecting each room I want a catwalk. Yeah, I said a catwalk. Not for models. But for cats. I want them to be able to walk from room to room without actually touching the floor. They’ll be spots along the way that has tiny beds where they can sleep. Then of course, I’ll want a room just for the cats that will house their belongings && a built-in cat bed window. You’ve seen them… the ones they build for inside cats to get sun – so it pokes out and it hangs. One of those.

My bedroom. I want it cozy. Maybe a smaller fireplace, but it’s not a necessity. A large, walk-in closet that has places to put shoes, and your clothes, and of course space for putting things up. A built-in master bathroom that has a huge tub for soaking. Two sinks with lots – && I MEAN LOTS – of storage space. (My bathroom right now has no spot for towels. It’s crazy.) I want a whole row of drawers along one wall, a small closet inside the restroom for towels, and then a tall thin closet for toilet paper. I want a huge shower, one that you have a spot to sit down in if you wanted to. I want the water to come from the ceiling rather than in front of me.

An extra bedroom for people that need a place to sleep. It’ll be an average looking bedroom. Small closet with a built-in dresser inside the closet.

I will need an exercise / computer room. Kind of like I do now, except it will have bookshelves built in. It will kind of be like a small library except with exercise equipment and a computer.

Boyfriend talks about having a room for his game systems, but I’d rather just built that into the living room – that way I know I will be able to see him. I usually just read, or play on my phone, when he is playing his games. If he has his own room for it, I don’t think I’ll ever see him. && I don’t like that idea – at all.

Laundry room – I want a large space. With shelves, a small sink and places to hang things if I need to. I want it off the back of the house, where the backdoor is connected to it. Outside the backdoor would be the garage – then the laundry room is connected to the kitchen, with a door, so when you buy groceries, you can just bring them through the laundry room.

I want a staircase. Just one. One that circles and the only thing upstairs will be my bedroom / bathroom. I’ve always had dreams of being able to decorate a banister for Christmas. ((Yes, a lot of my dream house relies heavily on Christmas ideas. But if you knew me, that wouldn’t surprise you.))

Outside I would want a fire pit, a storage building, and a cellar (I do live in Oklahoma). Beautiful green grass and my two cats that are buried in the yard to have a beautiful spot. I want to decorate them for them, so they know I still think about them on the daily. Especially Babykins – I miss her so much.

I’m sure there would be more to my dream house, but this is what I can think of at this moment.

Break Me Off A Piece.

Do you need a break? From what?

Honestly, sometimes I feel like I just need a break from life. Not death. I don’t want to die. 💀 Just a break. A vacation from life, if you will.

Most like to say a break from work. Work is fine. It’s life. Or they’ll say family. I like my family. But sometimes a small break from life would be grand.

Not a forever break, of course. Just a few hours. Like sleep in the other room break. Go stay at my brother’s house sort of break. Go to the grocery store alone break. Read a long book in a room alone break. Play a video game without kids screaming your name break. (I have no kids, but you get it). Take a long rod trip with no destination break. Go to the movie theater and sit in the back break. Eat a whole box of popcorn break.

Just a break.

To-do List.

Something on your “to-do list” that never gets done.

That’s easy: dishes && laundry.

I know it said one thing but I’m pretty sure my dishes and laundry is in the same pot. I feel like the more I do of each, the more there is to do. Like they multiply. They have sex in the night && by morning they’ve reproduced by the millions.

Our dish washer broke. 😞 So it is going to be even more of a headache to do the dishes. But then again, I haven’t met anyone that loves to do dishes. Do you love to do dishes?

It takes three to four times to dry out laundry. Then when we finally get it dry, takes me another fourteen ages to actually fold and put it up. But I think a lot of people do that. 😂😂 When I lived alone I would do laundry, end up putting it on my bed, && sleeping with it for a good month. 🧺

But what can I say? 🍽️ 🧺

Places to see. People to do.

Name an attraction or town close to home that you still haven’t got around to visiting.

So I live in southern Oklahoma. So southern that I’m about 15 minutes from Texas. A short trip half way across a bridge – BAM! 💥 I am in Texas. In fact, I am closer to Denton, Texas than Oklahoma City and the same distance from here to Dallas and here to Oklahoma City.

My point?

I have never been to Six Flags over Texas. For the ones not from Oklahoma or Texas, that doesn’t seem like a big deal. However, if you’re from around here && I say that, it still shocks people.

Six Flags over Texas is one of those places people here get yearly passes. They go there all the time. Any chance they get.

Then there’s me. I have been to Walt Disney World in Florida – but not Six Flags. Go figure!

But let’s be honest. I haven’t been to a lot of places. Zoos. Aquariums. Museums. I don’t get out much. Even as a kid, I didn’t have friends that asked me to go places like that with them && my parents didn’t have the money to go.

As a kid I spent a lot of time with my mom – usually wherever she worked, you’d probably be able to find me. So going to places like that just didn’t seem like a big deal.

As an adult, I kind of wish I had gone. But who would I have gone with? && now, those places interest me, but I feel like I am too old. If I had children of my own, I could see going – but I don’t. I feel like those places (even thinking about going to Walt Disney World) are built and made for children to enjoy. Single adults can’t go by themselves.

I mean, yeah… I could “borrow” children from family. But isn’t that weird?

First and Foremost.

Write about your first computer.

I was twelve when we got the first family computer. So approximately 1999.

It wasn’t fancy, just an average white computer. 💻 I am pretty sure it was the same computer most families bought. Except for my best friend who had one of those clear backs with color made by McIntosh and sold my Apple – “iMac”. I was so jealous of her computer. I wanted one so bad! Hers was blue.

I do remember being fascinated by it. (Kind of still am fascinated by computers). It’s the reason I took computer classes in middle and high school. I’m pretty sure it’s the reason I took computers in college. && I’m pretty sure I can blame that, and my High School computer teacher, as to why I can type 100 words per minute.

We had dial up. So I always had to ask permission to get online. But at 12, I didn’t find much use online. My mom used it the most to talk to my cousin who lived in Michigan. They used to write handwritten letters to each other, then they got computers. (Well, sometimes they used a typewriter but mostly written by hand. *pretty sure that’s where I get my love of being a pen-pal).

I didn’t really get into computers – staying on them for hours and hours – until I was around 16. That’s when I dropped out of high school. That’s when I became a whole different person. Online I was the version of myself I always wanted to be. In person – most people didn’t know I still existed. *that’s more true than I’d like to admit*

I lived on the computer until I was in my early 20’s. After that I couldn’t figure out what I did online that took so much of my time. So much of my life. Now I will get on the computer for writing purposes (I also work with computers), or maybe to Google something. I am not on it very long – if I get on it.

Today I have a Dell computer that I bought off Amazon. It came with two monitors and a keyboard. The monitors didn’t work and the keyboard was trash. So I bought a monitor from Wal-Mart – it MIGHT be Samsung or an off brand something or another. The keyboard lights up and I bought it on New Egg. 🥚

Take Two.

Tuesday the sixth.

I was called back by the surgeons office this afternoon. Woo! 🧑🏻‍⚕️ They were willing to set my appointment for tomorrow, but I can’t do that – I work tomorrow. So I told them Tuesday’s are best for me and I am free for whenever. So next Tuesday it is…

Normally I would ramble on and on about thoughts, worries, etc. But today will be short because I’m using my cell phone to write this. Why? Don’t laugh! 👀 One of my cats, Odis, was asleep in my computer chair && I didn’t want to wake him up. So I left the room to use my phone. ☎️

But I will say this much. My “fat brain” is freaking out && I know that it’s going to take a lot to calm it down. However, I know I need to do this to survive – I’m just, probably like everyone else on the planet that has done this surgery, scared of how it’s going to change me.

The thought of taking an hour to eat one scrambled egg terrifies me. Although, I’m pretty sure by 30 minutes in, I’m going to get bored of eating. 🍽️

I did have a check up with my doctor today. We didn’t do much so I have nothing new to go by. I did tell him that when I eat I sweat, which is weird – asked if I should be worried. He said no – he is pretty sure it’s because of my Trulicity. I also asked for a prescription of antacids because BOY! Woo! All I get anymore is heartburn. Sucks. I have an appointment next month to check my A1C. Hopefully it has gone down. I know my daily numbers are lower. Send a prayer up for me on that.

I will stop on that note && will pick it back up again later on.

Waiting Games.

I’m not a fan of waiting games.

I’m one of those people that if I call a business, any business, I think they should answer the phone. && if they pay someone to just answer phones, that person should answer the phone. I don’t like leaving messages, because when I leave a message – no one calls me back.

I called the weight loss surgeon’s office today. It’s been three weeks && one day since I last called them to inquire about starting the journey over. I got an answering machine – at 2:30 PM. So I left my name, number, date of birth && a brief message, just like it asked me to.

Do I think I’m going to get a call back? No, I honestly don’t.

I had a doctor once that never answered the phone. Even though they paid someone to sit at the front desk && answer phones. The recording said “press one for texting”. If I physically call you – I don’t want to text you. Mostly because most people can’t read. As harsh as that is, people can’t read. && they see my text message and for some reason when I use full words, and complete English, they can’t read. Actually that’s not true. 

I’m annoyed.

People can read. I just don’t like to wait. 

If the surgeon people want to know why I stopped going last year all they have to do is ask. I’ll tell them the truth. Trust me, it takes too much to lie. But they aren’t even asking questions. They just haven’t called me back. The 8th, when I called them, “we will call you back”. Three weeks later. 

I don’t know what else to do. I guess I will just wait some more. I just want to get this journey started over so I can get to the point of having the surgery. I’m tired of feeling like I do all the time && it’s because of my weight. 

I need help.

Cold && Tired.

I’m writing this on my phone tonight. Ever just not feel like life? That’s me tonight.

It’s cold && I’m not liking it. Normally I love the cold but this year I’m not. Our pipes froze so if we have to use the restroom we go to the local gas station – which sucks.

I’m sitting in bed right now under three blankets listening to SpongeBob. We have a space heater going but it only does so much. Thankfully we usually have like 8 cats in bed with us, so that helps with body heat.

But that’s me tonight in a nutshell. I almost said to heck with writing for today but decided I really need to write something. So here is my “something”.

Have a good night. See y’all tomorrow…

Second Chances: Yes or No?

How do you feel about second chances?

I know I started doing these one a day questions so I could find my passion for writing again, but if you’re following along and find a question you like, feel free to write about it. Tag back to me. See if we can get people to start one a day writing.

If you had asked me twelve or thirteen years ago how I felt about second chances, I’m pretty sure my answer would be different. (Keep in mind twelve years ago I was around 24.) Then I would have said everyone deserves a second chance. && while I still do think some do deserve a second chance, I’m not as lenient about who gets the second chance.

In my late teens to early twenties I would have said everyone deserves second chances. Everyone deserves a chance to show that they’d changed for the better. I honestly believed it. To the point that I was writing people in prison so they knew, that when their second chance started, they’d have a friend that believed in them. (I was around 15 to 17 when I was doing that. I don’t do that anymore. Although, I do miss having a pen pal.)

I think after the 100th time behind shafted for being so naïve, is when I finally stopped giving second chances to everyone. Now, of course, I do still believe, in some cases, that people do deserve second chances. && if I did something stupid, that someone, somewhere, would give me the second chance to prove I”ve changed.

However, I do not believe in double-second-chances. Once I give you a second chance to prove yourself, you do it again, I’m done. I’m walking away. Never looking back. I’m tired of being the laughing stock – the butt of jokes – just because at one point in my life I really believed in people && thought if they really wanted to change, they could.

What I have learned is. If they do want to chance. They can. But it has to be their decision and I cannot make that decision for them. I can’t be the one who is always cheering them on when they won’t take the first step to actually do what they need to do to prover that they are a changed person. Which is what second chances are. They are there to prove to everyone around you that you are ready to be a better person and not do the stupid, ignorant, convoluted things you were doing in the past. But if you can’t commit to the change, why should I go out of my way to help you?

Can you tell I’ve been burned a few times?

I think my issue is that I haven’t been burned a lot with second chances, that was usually with a family member, because why would a family member screw you over multiple times? (I did say I can be naïve.) I think my issue is who to trust more than who needs a second chance.

I have had friends through my life that I sit and wonder why we were “friends” && whether or not we were actually friends. I’m sure a lot of people think that way at some point in their lives. But I feel like I’ve thought it more often than I should. I could give examples, but I’m sure some of them will read this && then send me stupid messages && I don’t want to deal with it.

So in your opinion, second chances.. are they worth it? Or should everyone just steer clear of them? Are people worth it to see if they’d change?